First, LOL to BFE hometown. Second, your nervous system is reseting after a big life unraveling. And moving back somewhere you never planned to be is a lot take in. And I know that feeling of looking at your peers or at your own life and thinking wait is this really it or is something better going to come along eventually??
It's the second one…I promise.
Now let's get to the money talk bc that's why you're here and you have a genuinely incredible opportunity sitting right in front of you that most people in your position would kill for.
1. The upside of not paying rent is a true gift right now.
The fact that you are living at home with almost no bills is one of the most powerful financial windows that currently exist in this crazy world. Most people at 33 years old are spending 30 to 50% of their income on rent alone. Which translates to having the ability to do in 12 to 18 months what would take most people 4 to 5 years.
BUT, and important but, only if you actually use the window.
You've been there 8 months and haven't saved much, which means the window is open and the money is going out on fun stuff instead of into future you. Look - I will not sit here and tell you to stop living your life. Those concerts and the trips abroad and the adrenaline of being newly single are very real and they matter. But right now - you're spending like you're back in NYC on a NYC budget without the NYC rent.
2. Here's what I want you to do immediately.
Open a HYSA if you don't already have one and set up AUTOMATIC transfers the day your money hits your account. Make sure this is not what is left over after spending - very important. It should be the first thing that moves out of your account. Even if it's just $500/month right now - that's $6k/year future you will be very, very grateful for.
After that, then figure out your actual number. What number do you need to save to eventually move back to the city and feel stable doing so?
Just work backwards from that number and it makes the saving feel purposeful instead of just sheer deprivation.
3. Now let's talk business
Business and profitable are two completely different things - and more importantly, you should know your numbers. Here's the quick gut check:
Take everything that came in last month, then subtract what you actually spent to deliver that work (that includes your time, any tools or subscriptions, contractor costs, taxes (make sure you are setting aside 30%!) What's left from from all of that is your actual profit. If you don't know that number off the top of your head then finding it out is your homework this week.
A service based business that feels busy but isn't profitable is one of the most exhausting traps out there. You always want to be building something that actually pays you, not just keeps you occupied.
4. Next lets talk comparing yourself to everyone.
I want to get this out of the way quickly - your mom's timeline was built for a different economy, a different housing market, and a COMPLETELY different world. She didn't have to navigate a pandemic, a broken housing market, student debt at scale, or the pressure of building a personal brand in the most competitive attention economy that has ever existed.
The joke is on all of us because there is no timeline, so you are not behind. Just because you are rebuilding after something hard happened, doesn't mean all is lost.
5. Ok so now to the actual cheat code you asked for. Here's the playbook (in order)
And the last note I'll leave you with. You did not come back home to hide - you came back to reset. Just make sure the reset includes your finances too.
Best of luck. You got this!! xx
First, LOL to BFE hometown. Second, your nervous system is reseting after a big life unraveling. And moving back somewhere you never planned to be is a lot take in. And I know that feeling of looking at your peers or at your own life and thinking wait is this really it or is something better going to come along eventually??
It's the second one…I promise.
Now let's get to the money talk bc that's why you're here and you have a genuinely incredible opportunity sitting right in front of you that most people in your position would kill for.
1. The upside of not paying rent is a true gift right now.
The fact that you are living at home with almost no bills is one of the most powerful financial windows that currently exist in this crazy world. Most people at 33 years old are spending 30 to 50% of their income on rent alone. Which translates to having the ability to do in 12 to 18 months what would take most people 4 to 5 years.
BUT, and important but, only if you actually use the window.
You've been there 8 months and haven't saved much, which means the window is open and the money is going out on fun stuff instead of into future you. Look - I will not sit here and tell you to stop living your life. Those concerts and the trips abroad and the adrenaline of being newly single are very real and they matter. But right now - you're spending like you're back in NYC on a NYC budget without the NYC rent.
2. Here's what I want you to do immediately.
Open a HYSA if you don't already have one and set up AUTOMATIC transfers the day your money hits your account. Make sure this is not what is left over after spending - very important. It should be the first thing that moves out of your account. Even if it's just $500/month right now - that's $6k/year future you will be very, very grateful for.
After that, then figure out your actual number. What number do you need to save to eventually move back to the city and feel stable doing so?
Just work backwards from that number and it makes the saving feel purposeful instead of just sheer deprivation.
3. Now let's talk business
Business and profitable are two completely different things - and more importantly, you should know your numbers. Here's the quick gut check:
Take everything that came in last month, then subtract what you actually spent to deliver that work (that includes your time, any tools or subscriptions, contractor costs, taxes (make sure you are setting aside 30%!) What's left from from all of that is your actual profit. If you don't know that number off the top of your head then finding it out is your homework this week.
A service based business that feels busy but isn't profitable is one of the most exhausting traps out there. You always want to be building something that actually pays you, not just keeps you occupied.
4. Next lets talk comparing yourself to everyone.
I want to get this out of the way quickly - your mom's timeline was built for a different economy, a different housing market, and a COMPLETELY different world. She didn't have to navigate a pandemic, a broken housing market, student debt at scale, or the pressure of building a personal brand in the most competitive attention economy that has ever existed.
The joke is on all of us because there is no timeline, so you are not behind. Just because you are rebuilding after something hard happened, doesn't mean all is lost.
5. Ok so now to the actual cheat code you asked for. Here's the playbook (in order)
And the last note I'll leave you with. You did not come back home to hide - you came back to reset. Just make sure the reset includes your finances too.
Best of luck. You got this!! xx